"I'll be happy when I'm happy"
in fact, it was just another brief moment of relief. it's not the eternal happiness that I always long for, well, the probability is not as much regarding to everything that had happened. history suggests to keep repeating itself. although I taste my true happiness, that costs me, as true pain, which is, I'm willing to persist. but, it seems to me, this train has to stop going in an infinite loop and I have no power left to prevent it. I just can't afford to leave, nor to stay.. and there is only two options. now that I finally was left, I'm not able to move even an inch.
I'll be happy when I'm happy. I'll be sad when I'm sad. I'll leave when I leave. I'll stay when you stay.
all is useless tautology.
or, is it?
